Spicy Rosé ‘the next big trend’ say idiots

spicy rosé
Rosé pic: Bikanski, Pixnio

Spicy Rosé is being hailed as a ‘huge trend that’s here to stay’, by people who have no idea what they’re talking about.

The phenomenon– started by TikTok star Allyssa – involves infusing slices of jalapeno in a flask of rose and has been described as ‘the perfect poolside drink for summer – provided you have first snorted your taste-buds into non-existence with an out of control cocaine habit.’

More approachable

‘This is a great way of making rosé accessible to new drinkers,’ said drinks blogger Ella Biscuits. ‘Many younger drinkers struggle with the hard-to-like flavours and intensely tannic structure of rosé, so adding something to make it more approachable – such as slices of searingly hot chilli pepper – can really help.

Jerry Bubbles of hard seltzer brand, Racoon’s Tail agreed.

‘With this ground-breaking serve, young people will flock to try wine, decide they don’t like it and then go back to drinking our fizzy alcoholic water instead,’ he told Fake Booze.

More aggressive

Some of the wine trade, however, have been sceptical about the concept.

‘Chilli is such an aggressive flavour,’ said booze hack Francis Jobbinson. ‘Frankly, there are much better ways of adding green pepper to your glass, such as a few drops of Loire Sauvignon Blanc or anything from the Haut Medoc.’

Though she admitted that there was ‘some sense’ in getting people used to pungent flavours that brought tears to your eyes in case they ever wanted to try a natural wine.

Drink of ’22

Market Research company Boozalysis have described spicy rosé as the ‘flavour of summer 2022’ and say that it shows no sign of slowing down.

‘There are already stories of people adding cassia bark to white Burgundy to create a ‘Cinnamontrachet’,’ said researcher Polly Prolix.  ‘In the spiced wine world, anything goes!

‘Make no mistake, this is a hot, hot trend – literally!’

For better for Gewurz

However ‘vinfluencer’ Ella Biscuits was more cautious.

‘Not all drinks are as natural a match as a delicate glass of pink and a palate-nuking chilli,’ she told Fake Booze. ‘For instance, I wouldn’t add anything spicy to Barossa Shiraz, since it already tastes like cough medicine.

‘And I’d steer clear of adding anything to Gewurztraminer too, in case you accidentally stumble across something that makes you want to drink it.’

Read here how a French supermarket pulled rosé from its shelves after finding ‘fragments of flavour’ in the bottle.

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