UK thrilled at prospect of even cheaper Kiwi Sauvignon Blanc

Wave Pic: Wikilmages, Pixabay

British business groups have hailed the latest trade deal with New Zealand as ‘a great one for producers of Marlborough Sauvignon Blanc in both countries.’

‘Lowering the price a bit is really going to help raise awareness of this highly niched and barely visible style,’ said Drab Forecast of the Wine and Spirit Trade Executive (WASTE).

‘Since Kiwi Sauvignon has in no way filled up supermarket wine aisles over the last three decades, it’s clearly a country that needs our help.’

I heart Savvy B

Consumer groups have welcomed the deal, saying that ‘anything that helps people get drunk and forget their miserable existence more cheaply has to be a good thing.’

Fake Booze ran into John Public outside his local Pricefixer supermarket, where he was loading a 20-litre ‘party special’ of Brainclot Estate Sauvignon into his 4×4.

‘I love Sauvignon Blanc,’ he said. ‘It’s my favourite region in France.

‘Well, that and Gallo.’

Uncertain benefit

The UK’s wine producers said they weren’t sure how much the trade deal would benefit them.

‘They already have quite a lot of cool climate sparkling in New Zealand, I believe,’ said Mainley Posh-Boyes of the Society for Production of English Wine (SPEW).

‘But we think there might be an opportunity for overpriced still wines made with unfashionable hybrid grape varieties.

‘Particularly if they taste of fox fur rather than fruit.’

Win win

A spokesman for the UK government said the deal was a ‘great one for both sides’.

‘The Kiwis can sell us high-value items such as lamb, wine and weird honey,’ they said. ‘In return we get to export things that they are short of and where we lead the world.

‘Such as Coronavirus.’

So much cheaper

Pyra Zine for the Sauvignon Producers Association of Marlborough (SPAM) said her members were looking forward to passing on the benefits to the UK consumer.

‘This deal will make our wines even more accessible to wine lovers everywhere,’ she told Fake Booze.

‘At least, it would if we had any wine to sell. Which we don’t. So currently everything is twice the price. Sorry.’

If British officials were looking to make wine cheaper and easier to import, she suggested they could ‘always try striking free-trade deals with larger producing areas closer to home, such as the EU’.

Click here for Fake Booze’s Ten Key Facts about Sauvignon Blanc

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